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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24171508">Valentine &amp; Vimes: Another Life</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aleaiactaest/pseuds/Aleaiactaest'>Aleaiactaest</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slyjinks/pseuds/Slyjinks'>Slyjinks</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Valentine &amp; Vimes [15]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Discworld - Terry Pratchett, Fallout 4, Hellblazer, The Dresden Files - Jim Butcher</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alcohol, Crossover, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 22:07:57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>754</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24171508</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aleaiactaest/pseuds/Aleaiactaest, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slyjinks/pseuds/Slyjinks</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>This will serve as a collection of AU tangents to the main Valentine &amp; Vimes universe, because sometimes we like to get speculative.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Nick Valentine &amp; Sam Vimes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Valentine &amp; Vimes [15]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1689076</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Valentine &amp; Vimes: Another Life</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>At this point, this little AU bit contains some mild spoilers for the main series.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Constantine hated these multiversal blowouts. He’d wake up somewhere, anywhere, with a hell of a hangover, and then he had to play ‘when and where was John Constantine’. In any case, the city smelled like London, and the accent was right, but he didn’t recognize any of it. He thought he’d been buffeted back in time a bit, too, to judge by the overall tech level, although the tech level was… strange.</p><p>These folks were very keen on shoving tiny demons in little devices. Constantine had seen demons in cameras, demons watching traffic, demons in hundred dollar bills, and demons in bloody PDAs. Well, it was their folly, no skin off his nose.</p><p>The place reeked of magic, though, even as it just plain reeked. It wasn’t just all the demoniac devices. The ‘Unseen University’ was like a bloody magic dump site. Some of the cobblestones fluttered away from Constantine, as he staggered through his hangover. He took one look at one of the wizards headed to the university and concluded that these blokes were a bunch of prissy wankers with a bad hat fetish.</p><p>Which meant they weren’t going to be his first second, third, or even <em>z</em>th option for getting home. The hangover seemed more pressing to address, anyway. The city - by now, he’d caught that it was called Ankh-Morpork - was dangerous enough, in its own way, and he had a few small scuffles, but eventually, he ended up at the Cockpit on Cock Spit Croft, which was the sort of pub that could only be a gay bar, but he’d already gotten some bloke to buy him a drink, so he didn’t care.</p><p>The bar had Colas, which was a mite odd. It didn’t seem to fit the whole medieval fantasy pastiche that the city had going on. There was so much of the city that didn’t fit. So he was sucking on something like an alternate universe rum and coke and scanning around the pub, trying to decide how to go about finding someone who might have the power and lack of discretion required to breach interdimensional borders, when a bloody android sat down next to him.</p><p>It - no, he, Constantine decided this android was definitely a he - had clearly spotted Constantine before Constantine had spotted him, which was a bother. He was no Red Tornado. The glowing yellow-opticed android had on a fedora, a trenchcoat, shirt, tie, and trousers, all in the local style. He’d clearly seen some damage, and he appeared to be drinking a whiskey on the rocks. The android gave him a friendly smile and said, “Nice trenchcoat. Where’d you buy it?” He had an American accent - Chicago?</p><p>Was the bloody android hitting on him? Constantine rolled his eyes. “Primark.”</p><p>“You’re not from here,” said the android.</p><p>“Neither are you.”</p><p>“Where’re you from?” asked the implausibly American android.</p><p>“Oh, here and there,” said Constantine evasively, weighing his options. The android wasn’t from here, so maybe he’d have an idea on how to get out…</p><p>“Heh. Heard that one. It’s almost as good as, ‘I’m from lots of places,’” said another man, who’d managed to sneak up on his other side, the blighter.</p><p>Constantine frowned sourly and took a look at him. Short, scruffy, holding a bottle of soda, which he lifted to take a swig of, and his shirtsleeve slipped just a bit. There was a demonmark on his arm. Constantine couldn’t say which demon, but that was definitely a demonmark. Trying to sound bored, he asked, “What’s it to you busybodies?”</p><p>“You’re in the Shades, and you’ve run into the one person who cares about waifs and strays,” said the scruffy man, looking at the android.</p><p>The android rolled his optics. “He cares, too; he’s just a jerk. So if you’re lost -”</p><p>That was when they all heard a rather loud <em>bang</em> on the street outside.</p><p>Both the android and the demonmarked man went to the door and looked outside. Many of the patrons were too inebriated to care. Some scattered off toward the back, probably to a back door. The bartender, though, looked not to the bouncers but to the android and the demonmarked man.</p><p>Constantine made a note of where the back exit was, and he didn’t rush to the door, but he sidled over there and craned his head out. He sniffed. Big magic discharge, man in a black duster sprawled out on the street clutching a staff… yes, he’d be going out the back door of the pub, he decided.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is a little AU bit. A friend speculated about Sam Vimes, Nick Valentine, John Constantine, and Harry Dresden running into each other. I was unable to work in Agent Washington and/or the Midnight Crew. One may assume they are in the background.</p><p>Nick “Genuinely A Good Person” Valentine is one of the few people who would look at John Constantine and think, “Oh, maybe he needs help.”</p><p>Harry Dresden is the man in the black duster out on the street, because within 50 seconds of being in Ankh-Morpork, he’d pick a fight with something from the Dungeon Dimensions. He would try to fight it with magic and learn the hard way that not only does magic not work but makes it worse. Likely, Eskarina Smith would have to show up and explain unmagic to Harry Dresden, and then he’d get a power-up. That’s how it usually goes for him.</p><p>Harry Dresden and Nick Valentine can’t actually be in the same room, because he’d make Nick Valentine shut down with his ambient technology fritz field, and then Sam Vimes would punch Dresden, and that all just goes to pot.</p><p>Harry Dresden fits the bill of being both powerful and lacking in discretion, but Constantine has gone out the back door, so it’s somewhat unclear how Constantine is going to con Harry Dresden into getting him back home. People will just have to imagine it.</p><p>The Cockpit on Cock Spit Croft is a canon location. It’s not explicitly a molly house, but come on...</p></blockquote></div></div>
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